Even Grass Besomes Milk...
Till when… how long will it be before I find out which way should I choose….
Lots of whys and hows are searching for an answer, my head is about to explode…. The piles of work stare at me and laugh… yes, another week with lots of things to do, and not enough hours in the day for anything… am still stuck, trapped, I can’t move :) I feel like a bird in a fancy golden cage… it’s filled with diamonds and pearls, but yet, it’s still a cage…
Lost? might be… madness? out of question… my hot cup of tea is soon going to be empty… so is my patience… am in the middle of nowhere…
They say it’s going to rain tomorrow morning… will it? or is it just another prediction? I can only wait to find out… but the problem is, I no more could wait to for an answer that leads to new questions without answers… am tired, tired of it all, tired of everything and everyone… nonsense? Perhaps…. Who said that everything in this world has to make sense?
Life is fair, that’s what he said, and I could only laugh… I couldn’t see how, I still don’t… is he right? is he wrong? Another question left without an answer….
“Trust me”, why should i? what for? Where is this going to end???? or am I supposed to keep on going in circles around my self without an exist? another whirlpool, with no way out…
“listen to your heart”, what about that voices that refuse to shut up… my conscious, my mind, and all the echoes in my head… how am I supposed to ignore all that???
I want to stop thinking, I want to vanish, to no more exist… just to be left alone… is that too much to ask for? It seems to be like it is…
I can only wait and see how this is gonna end, and where it’ll take me, but I have a feeling it won’t be anywhere near….
“Have patience! In time, even grass becomes milk.” - Charan Singh, mystic (1916-1990)
Lots of whys and hows are searching for an answer, my head is about to explode…. The piles of work stare at me and laugh… yes, another week with lots of things to do, and not enough hours in the day for anything… am still stuck, trapped, I can’t move :) I feel like a bird in a fancy golden cage… it’s filled with diamonds and pearls, but yet, it’s still a cage…
Lost? might be… madness? out of question… my hot cup of tea is soon going to be empty… so is my patience… am in the middle of nowhere…
They say it’s going to rain tomorrow morning… will it? or is it just another prediction? I can only wait to find out… but the problem is, I no more could wait to for an answer that leads to new questions without answers… am tired, tired of it all, tired of everything and everyone… nonsense? Perhaps…. Who said that everything in this world has to make sense?
Life is fair, that’s what he said, and I could only laugh… I couldn’t see how, I still don’t… is he right? is he wrong? Another question left without an answer….
“Trust me”, why should i? what for? Where is this going to end???? or am I supposed to keep on going in circles around my self without an exist? another whirlpool, with no way out…
“listen to your heart”, what about that voices that refuse to shut up… my conscious, my mind, and all the echoes in my head… how am I supposed to ignore all that???
I want to stop thinking, I want to vanish, to no more exist… just to be left alone… is that too much to ask for? It seems to be like it is…
I can only wait and see how this is gonna end, and where it’ll take me, but I have a feeling it won’t be anywhere near….
“Have patience! In time, even grass becomes milk.” - Charan Singh, mystic (1916-1990)
posted by Rain Drop @ 10/14/2006 11:57:00 PM
6 Comments:
At Monday, October 16, 2006 8:28:00 PM ,
Tala said...
Hey Dima
if there is something you are doing that you dont like to do AND you have a choice of not doing it DONT DO IT. if you are forced on something, you have to at least explain to who is concerned how you feel.
work never finishes, but the project you are working at will finish eventually, you have a good team and you are doing well so far. touch wood :)
actually Dima if you look @ the physical layer. there is nothing going wrong. its all about your mental state, your state of mind. your mind gets tired when its continueously buffering!! i turn to the WORST COMPLAINER MODE WHEN I AM TIRED. 3adii.
the circumferance, people, problems all try to put us down most of the time, and sometimes you can't just ignore and keep moving forward.
but really, you can't say that you are lost because you are not. you know how its going to be all through the coming 10 months at least. you have to think whats after these 10 months,, and there is no escape of whats coming. you have to be prepared, opportunities are everywhere, and it no time, it can twist your life. it puts at another set.
but really,,, i was thinking of this question on the way home, is there anyone i know that i would want to switch life with? ..
my answer was no. because my pain is no less than others, nor my happiness is no less than others.
and the wheel keeps on circling.
but if there are things on your mind that keep getting you to open loops, just dont think of them, because only time reveals the answers. this is true..
At Tuesday, October 17, 2006 12:21:00 PM ,
Anonymous said...
Well i am sure there is something bothering you , which in the normal circumstances wont be casuing u so much pain , bs since it emerged while u have lots of risk factors , including , being hungry and tired all day , having lots of work to do , not having lots of free time for yourself cuz of Ramadan besides the work load u have , and for sure many other things u have .......... Bs ya3ni u said it all in the titel - which i couldnt figure out the relation bw it and what were u saying till the end , be patient! In my dictionary u ll find that under time , its all about time time time , give it some time and all this pain and worries will vanish ...... " Grass will turn into milk , but give it some time "
CheeerZ!
At Tuesday, October 17, 2006 12:23:00 PM ,
Anonymous said...
And yeah by the way , try to shutdown all yr systems and relax , try to do some of the enjoyable things u always like to do , and reset yr mood !
CheeerZ!
At Tuesday, October 17, 2006 4:29:00 PM ,
Rain Drop said...
taltool :)
ur right, i can hardly think of any1 whom i'd like to switch lives with...
am not worried about uni or my project... i know it's stressing, but i've always managed to find a way, and i know i will this time :)
but when it comes to "things" where it's not about what's right or what's wrong... u can't just say no, u have to explain, and u know that if u do, u'll be hurting others...
currently, there is nthg i could do, am just waiting for the "cow" to show up and transform the grass into milk ;)
Dar: these are normal circumstances :) this is how my everyday life looks like, so i don't think it would have made a difference if it happened some other time... what am talking about has been going on for more than a year now... and i still can't figure out what should i do about it, it's frustraiting :)
At Wednesday, October 18, 2006 10:38:00 AM ,
rowdyrascal said...
This too shall come to pass.
At Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:36:00 PM ,
Rain Drop said...
Thank you rowdyrascal :) i truely hope so...
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